Facebook Grammar: I Was Okay Until I Hit "Gotten Some New Friends?"

I joined facebook about three weeks ago as an exploration exercise in new social media.

For the uninitiated among my vast readership, facebook is kind of like a communal online diary. It's a very cool human connection technology, right up there in scope of impact with the telegram and the middle finger salute in traffic. I love the broadcast, immediacy, and fluidity of the medium. I love the ability to both deliver and check in on the minutiae of daily life that at least gives the sense of close proximity with loved ones spread across, literally, the planet. The "status" option allows a person to give a one-line snapshot of what is the consuming thought of the moment, kind of like when you bump into a family member in front of the fridge and ask "What are you having for lunch?" and they respond, "Dunno... do you think this dim-sum from Saturday is still edible?"

It has been an addictive hoot. Not only did I get some swell comments from my kids: "Love that you're here... Now you can stalk me remotely" or "Hmmm... I'm not sure how I feel about you being on facebook! It's kind of like when I was in Grade 7 and found out you liked MC Hammer...." Apparently, they feel like it's a proactive collision of worlds, or in the words of my son, "Mom, if this were the fifties, it would be like you coming and sitting beside me in the malt shop." HA! So I started a group called "I Freaked Out My Kids By Joining Facebook." We're up to 8 members.

But aside from stalking my kids, I also found and re-connected with many dear Friends Of A Respectable Age. This is just a treat and a joy to hear what they are all up to. I've found that just because you lose sight doesn't mean you lose touch at the heart level. I'm delighted that Ellie is moving back to where she can keep daily contact with all her zany and marvelous sisters, and that George is running for Mayor of High Level. (I bet he's doing it on a dare.)

So, it's all good until I encounter an application on a friends' page called "Friends Block" that announces its benefit statement* in the following terms: "Gotten Some New Friends?"

And now I'm in my own collision of worlds. Knowing that I stand a slim to inconceivably non-existent margin of hope of influencing the grammatical sustainability of facebook, do I stay or leave? Stay tuned...

*Even in new social media, no one escapes the need to answer the question "So, why should I care about what you are offering?" Marketing is an ancient and honorable profession.